Tuesday, June 10--Day 15

I'm in a bit of a panic and trying not to be.  Clare is having an echocardiogram (ultrasound) on her heart today, because they've detected a periodic murmur that I think is showing up more frequently and more pronounced.  I wasn't really worried until today, with the addition of "showing up more frequently and more pronounced" part.  About 50% of preemies have murmurs, and they often correct themselves on their own.  This is because an infant's heart has a hole that needs to close (in the womb, blood moves directly between the ventricles because the baby doesn't breathe;  after birth, this channel needs to close up, rerouting the blood from one ventricle to the newly-engaged lungs, and then into the other ventricle) and many preemies haven't had a chance to do this yet.  These are the murmurs that resolve themselves on their own as the baby matures.  But what's this about it getting more pronounced?  Her blood oxygen levels remain good and her lungs remain clear, but she had edema and what about her blood oxygen levels being a little lower today than usual?  Thoughts of surgery and fears of more time in the hospital are creeping in, though I'm trying to shoo them out.  I think of all the ultrasounds we had with Dr. Read over the course of the pregnancy, and each time he specifically examined her heart, looking for signs of genetic abnormalities.  Each time he showed us how well Clare's little heart was working, both by examining its structure and by looking at blood flow.  Her heart was part of what Dr. Read called her "beautiful anatomy," and I'm just hoping that giving birth to her too soon hasn't compromised this.

One of the noisy babies is going home today.  We wish him and his family the best.  New babies have come in--one all the way from Grays Harbor.  It won't be long before we know them all by their cries too.